I'm coming out

Don't be fooled: I didn't want the world to know. I wanted to go about my business and never have anyone ask about my personal life. I never thought my sexuality should be my defining characteristic - I still don't. The difference now is that I also don't view it as a point of shame. Once I realized there was nothing inherently wrong with me, personal acceptance came pretty easily. This did not cure my inherent fear of rejection. I had grown pretty dismissive of disapproving acquaintances, but couldn't muster the courage to approach my family, for fear of being dismissed, myself. My fears were bolstered both by personal conversations with devoutly religious family members believing homosexuality to be a choice, and by stereotypes of familial judgment and rejection. Everyone has heard horror stories of parents disowning their gay children, or worse, cutting them off financially! One of my closest friends lived his own version of the former. These combined factors made me reticent to reveal this aspect of my life to my family. I will surely elucidate this story in further depth over the course of this project, but in short, what I experienced was nothing less than the precise opposite. My parents, not dolts by any stretch of the imagination, had been bracing for the news since I broke up with my high school girlfriend, who, frankly, was a bitch, but they believed her to be perfect, and were certain any man willing to end a relationship with her must not be entirely "normal." What they offered was precisely what I needed - unconditional love; not just tolerance, but acceptance. And they were completely unwilling to deny or hide my identity. Rather, they were proactive; they set about sharing the "news" with our entire family so that anyone with anything untoward to say would say it to them and not me. They were in parent mode - they protected me (albeit from nothing, as no one in my extended family proffered anything but kind words, either). I know for some, overcoming a traumatic "coming out" is a personal triumph. Do you think maybe I should begrudge my parents for robbing me of this obstacle to overcome?! But really, what I discovered through this experience was so much more valuable than any amount of relying on myself - I already knew how to do that. This proved to me that I could trust enough to rely on someone else.